Death Wish

Seriously. That is what Eli woke up with today. He is teething his two-year molars, but that can't possibly possess someone to act out in such a horrendous manner (nor does it justify it)! We were awake at the house for about 90 minutes before leaving for church. Eli seriously spent about 60 of those minutes in time-outs. Good Gravy! It wasn't 50 occurrences either: he really only got placed into a time-out two or three times (which is still a lot, in my opinion). The problem was he continually failed to get out of his prison (it was the time-out stool, but he was moved to his crib since he wouldn't stay in his designated area). Lehr and I require that Eli do three things before he can re-enter the world: show self-control (sitting with hands folded), apologize to the offended, and give a hug or kiss to the parent who placed him there. This morning he fought the self-control for a long time. Then he would get there only to refuse apologies. I felt like I was hitting my head on the wall!! Then when he apologized, it would only be half way (he wouldn't identify the offense). Some of you might be reading this thinking, "Come on!! He's only two!!! He can't be expected to do all of that!" But I assure you he can and he does on a regular basis. We've been doing this type of repentance for almost six months now, and he totally gets it. Today he just chose not to. I'm pretty sure he was tolerable during church, as he was fine when I picked him up from his classroom even though I warned the teacher in his room that he might be a handful, so paging me during the service was expected.

Things weren't better after his nap. He continued down a bad road until our dinner guests arrived. I think he honestly thought, "No matter what they say, I will do the opposite today." Eli was a wild-man while our company was here, but nothing to warrant removal. I spent a LOT of time thinking about this today and starting tomorrow morning we are upping the stakes where his main offense is concerned. When Eli gets in a frustrated/angry mood and swats at one of us (something that is totally unacceptable in my book, and also something that is becoming too frequent with Eli), he will still be placed in time-out, but also one of his favorite sports toys will be in a day-long time-out. Eli is obsessed with all things sports: baseball, soccer, basketball, tennis, golf.... He has all of the gear and he uses them on an hourly basis while we're at home. My justification is that he is showing a great deal of immaturity and lack of self-control. In order to enjoy the great gifts people (including us) have given him, he needs to respect the world he lives in. (And we are a big part of his world!!) I'm hoping it will hit close to home for him. One of the obstacles for me right now (and other parents of toddlers, I'm sure), is kids this age will test limits continually regardless of the consequence because that's their job. They are figuring out the world right now and that includes constantly checking the boundaries. So sometimes you don't know if the punishment works for quite some time. How's that for making life more difficult?!

On a side note, I am still confident the time-outs are working for Eli. (Just not today!!) He usually apologizes before I even ask him to, and he often cries when I put him in isolation. Therefore, we're not giving up on them yet!

Cheers and jeers, folks. Bring 'em!