Ruby Soccer

Ruby LOVES soccer. After two seasons of parent-kids Sunday 'practices', Lehr signed Ruby up for a 4-year old team this fall. She had a blast, playing with a handful of other kids in a practice for half of the time, then a scrimmage with another team for half of the time. Lehr helped the coach, basically shadowing Ruby, but he said most of the time she stayed very engaged all on her own.

IEP

As we eluded to a month or so ago, Ruby was due for her annual IEP this month. This afternoon we sat down with Ruby's 'team' at school to discuss the goals currently on her IEP, modify or set new ones, and start the discussion about placement for next year. With Ruby having a summer birthday, she will either be older or younger than her peers, depending on when we start her in Kindergarten. This was a tough decision for us when we faced it with Eli...it is proving to be equally as tough with Ruby.

First, let's talk about the goals. Ruby mastered all of the social, behavioral, speech and OT goals set for her at the end of last year (we did an IEP amend before school let out). We put some new ones in place, mainly to get her through the end of this school year, though it has been obvious to me that her teachers are not holding anything back from Ruby. When she has shown mastery of a goal at school, they have moved on to the next thing for her without hesitation.

When the team talks about Ruby, they can't keep the smiles off of their faces; it's obvious how much they love working with her. And while they think she is ready to move on from their classroom, they will definitely miss her. (And she will miss them!) The talk about next year covered everything from Ruby's growth in the short time she's been in the Special Needs Pre-K to her ability to follow the classroom routines and transitions well. She is very social, and they don't see any issues with her in regards to typical peers. I asked many questions about what Kindergarten would look like for her (number of pull-outs, percent of time with typical peers, etc.); while answering these questions basically requires a crystal ball, Ruby's team still gave me solid responses.

And then, when I launched into my requests for things that would help better prepare her for a fall Kindergarten start, the meeting got even better. I asked for a few resources for things that Ruby would be expected to learn while in Kindergarten, and they gave them willingly. I asked for opportunities for Ruby to visit with a Kindergarten class before the end of the year to help get her acquainted with a bigger class size. Not only did they say they would make that happen, but they said they would try to have it start right after Christmas. (Hopefully circle time and some specials.) And here I was thinking that would be a difficult sell for a visit a few times before the end of the school year.

This is the part where I cheer and dance and rejoice because I know this IEP will likely go down as the best one we will ever have. This just isn't how it normally works.

At the end of the day, we are having to weigh our options. We have three: Kindergarten, repeat Special Needs Pre-K, or private Pre-K/Young 5's. I've visited a few private programs in the last few weeks, to see if those options really are options. One I found is great, amazing even, but comes with a steep price tag and a far commute. The other is affordable but carries no extras, and a lot of uncertainties. Now that we've seen how much Ruby can thrive in the right environment, I'm so scared of the missed opportunities we could face putting her in the 'not-right' place. Especially for a whole year. Especially when the whole reason of putting her there instead of Kindergarten is to see more growth.

As much as we love her SNPK, repeating means just that: repeating the same curriculum. And Ruby has mastered it - seriously mastered it. That doesn't mean she's up to speed with every other four-year-old out there, but the colors, letters, numbers, months, seasons, etc. that they teach in her class is all information Ruby has demonstrated comprehension of. So that means she could be very bored next year. Also, she would be 5 and her classmates would be 3 and 4. We know that so much of what Ruby has learned at Sope Creek so far has come from her classroom peers, but if they are younger, there is a chance she isn't learning from them anymore. Also, we've been so fortunate that Ruby has not picked up any undesirable behaviors at school. My girl is a big sponge that observes everyone very closely and follows their lead. If we were to roll the dice with another year, it's quite possible she could have a behavior model that ends up creating behaviors that we have to work hard to correct.

So that leaves us with Kindergarten. So many pros and cons for each of these choices, but especially this one. My girl would love it. Love. it. She would have some great models for speech, lots of new information for her to learn, and I have no doubt that the kids would rally around her and help her when needed. But we know about the delays. And the big question is would those delays put her in a position where she is away from typical peers more than she is with them. I would hope not, but that isn't an question anyone can answer right now.

So we wait and we pray and we pray some more.

Update

Ruby's speech has come oh-so far in the last six months. Even the last three months. That girl is talking SO much and saying up to 4 words in a 'sentence', spontaneously (as in, not repeating after me) very consistently at home. As with any language explosion, her articulation has suffered because she is in such a rush to say all of the new things she can say that her mouth can't quite catch up. Especially because she has to work so hard to correctly make those sounds anyway.

One of the areas Ruby has always excelled with speech has been her receptive language. Basically that means what she's able to understand as it is spoken to her. Now that she's giving us so much more in the expressive speech world (what she actually says), we can see all that she's been learning and holding on to.

Prime example: she knows her name and how to spell it and loves to tell you. This is something she's been doing for a little while, but this video from the other night just brings it home. Check out this chatterbox! (Gobble, Gobble)

So many times we see our kids work really hard on something they are struggling with. With my typical kids, I have definitely seen them struggle and sometimes not succeed, whether it's with a sport or an academic milestone. But most of the time, they got to their goal or the goal was not one that was required for every day life (like a new sport). With Ruby and her peers, we see our kids work hard - SO hard - day in and day out. On everything. Not many things arise in their day that they don't have to work on, from social skills to physically maneuvering their world to speaking. And what I didn't realize before I had Ruby was that many times this hard work goes 'unrewarded'. That is, they don't always see the fruits of their labor. So many times Ruby will work on a skill for months on end before mastering it. Or, we will work on it for a solid year and still not have mastered it. This video has been a good reminder to me to reward the hard work even when the result is not video-worthy.

Eli's Fall Soccer

Eli played soccer again this fall. He didn't even (to us) consider baseball, which broke my heart a bit, but I'm realizing that I'm holding on to it more than he is. (So I need to stop!)

This season Eli was in U14, so I expected there to be bigger kids on the teams. There were, but there were also enough "Eli-sized" kids to make him not stand out. This league meant using the turf field when playing at home. The turf field is BIG. I thought this might be a challenge for Eli, being smaller and not always the fastest. But he proved me wrong; that boy held his own in the running department!

One of the things I was most impressed with this season was Eli's all-in attitude on the field. He would get to practice early and do everything he was asked to, with hustle. And then during the games, he would throw himself into every play and commit. To the point where he was knocked around the field a lot and sometimes I felt like he was on his tookus more than he was on his feet. The size of the bigger guys never deterred him...crazy because he is the 'risk manager' in our family.

She is a Gem

Totally amazed by the oh-so strong sight word game Ruby is bringing these days.

Last week Ruby and I started working on sight words again. We did it pretty solidly through the spring and summer and we had about a dozen words that she was fairly consistent on knowing. As often happens with us, we got sidetracked with other therapy tools and practices and we haven't picked up the cards since August. Rather than go back to the original set, I pulled out some new cards/words (actually old - we used them for speech while we were in the hospital). After only two times of working on them, Ruby had a really good success rate (check out the video).

So fast-forward to yesterday when I was making Ruby's lunch. She was being a little impatient so I told her to get her chair and sit at the table to wait. She obeyed (which surprised me, by the way, since she doesn't tend to do that these days) and then fished around in the basket I keep on the table with therapy stuff. She pulled out the old cards (from spring/summer) and proceeded to correctly tell me half of them.

WHAAAAT?

We haven't touched those cards in over two months. One of the biggest struggles I have in working with Ruby on these things is how hard it seems for things to 'stick' with her unless we drill it daily. Literally daily. She very much proved me wrong...