A Big Heart

I didn't think it was possible for Maddux to shock me anymore, as she finds new ways to surprise everyone around her each day. But in the last few weeks Maddux has shown some crazy empathy and proactive kindness and protection in unexpected ways. Yes, she gives her brother random candy 'prizes' she earns at church, and yes, she hugs the bus driver when she boards in the morning (just because), but she's taken this compassion to a new level. I've been trying to explain 'big heart' to her as I always say it to her, but she keeps asking about the physical size. So far, all I've been able to do for her is say that the love in her heart is big.

No doubts about it, Maddux will be a great big sister, she is already an amazing little sister, and one day she'll be the best mother any child could hope for. (Sidenote: when we talk about where Maddux was when Eli was born, I always tell her 'my heart'. She knows she wasn't in my stomach at the same time as he was, but she was already in my heart. The other day she told me she has 100 babies in her heart. I don't doubt it.) Also, she is a cool friend. Two things came up recently that she did on her own, with no teaching:

• A week or so ago, Maddux lent one of her prized Disney princess dolls to a friend (Merida - the newest 'princess'). She was happy to do it and offered the doll up on her own. When it came time for her friend to return the doll, her mother saw a small rip in the doll's dress and asked me if it was already there. I honestly didn't have any idea. The parents know Maddux very well, so they asked her (when I was not there) and Maddux hemmed and hawed a little, saying, "No, but it's ok...REALLY! It's not a big deal." Seriously? How does she know to downplay something like that to spare their embarrassment or bad feelings for having slightly damaged one of her toys? 
• Maddux has a friend in her class that gets a little anxious when her mom comes to visit. She loves the visit but does not love the departure. When said mom has come into the class to help in the past, Maddux has reassured her friend when she starts to cry, "Don't worry - you'll see her at home real soon!" This last week, she stepped up her game. The mom (a friend of mine) told me that her daughter was fine through the time she was there, but when she stood up to leave, Maddux immediately found a classroom task that needed to be done and called out to her friend to help her with it, almost as a distraction tactic. The mom even said Maddux brushed off another child who was offering to help since the little girl wasn't responding to Maddux. I wish I knew where she got it, and I wonder how much of it I can learn from her.

One Hundred

Friday was the 100th day of school for the kids. Maddux had to count and bring in her snack with 100 pieces (we did 100 pieces of cereal), and Eli was supposed to dress as though he was 100 years old. Love it.

We talked about his outfit for a few days, but as usual, didn't pull the actual outfit out until the morning of. Lehr helped Eli get a pair of pants (anything but jeans is what we went for) and a button up shirt, as we discussed. Then Lehr and Eli added Eli's great-grandfather's flannel hat (awesome) and a crossword puzzle. I did have to explain why the puzzle made sense when he got home from the school, but he still brought it along.

A New Leaf?

Don't get me wrong: I love, love, LOVE Maddux's independent and crazy spirit. However, it can cause some frustration when it comes time to focus. Not that she can't focus when she wants to, but we struggle sometimes when others (namely Lehr or Nicole) want her to focus.

This has popped up most recently with activities. She loved gymnastics, but she often goofed around at least as much as she did what the teacher asked, and (just like at school), she has a tendency to take other students along for the ride. When it came time to sign her up again, I declined and then told her why. We had a few serious talks about what was expected at certain lessons or practices. That doesn't mean she can't have fun with them, but when it's time to listen and/or follow directions, she's gotta get with the program. Since we still have a month or two before soccer starts again, I opted to get the kids back in the pool, as we usually do this time of year. Just to remember how to use our arms and legs to keep us afloat. Maddux knew what was expected of her before this lesson and boy did she deliver. She was amazing: listening, following every instruction, and not causing any disruptions. She still had a smile on her face, she still laughed and enjoyed her time, but she was a focused girl!! Amazing.

Yesterday she showed us another level of maturity that we didn't expect. For a few years now, Eli has accompanied Lehr to music rehearsals at church. He will usually sit right next to the drum set and read or listen or play along quietly. We haven't let Maddux do this yet because, well...she can't seem to sit still. And if Lehr is in rehearsal, he can't chase her around the church, or even around the auditorium. This Sunday we took a chance and let her go to church early with him, as she requested. Another amazing display of self-control and obedience. She sat in the SAME chair the whole hour of rehearsal and colored, read, and watched. The girl is growing up!!

Baby Talk

The kids are all about the baby. Every day they ask me and talk to me about all things baby: when the baby will be here, what we'll do with the baby, what the baby is doing right now.... My favorites recently:

• We were mountain biking as a family and at one point Maddux got off of her bike and waited for me to finish a single-track section. She commented how bumpy it was and asked if I liked it. I told her it was fun. She said (very seriously), "I know the baby had fun with it too."
• Eli asks me daily, "Are you sure you can eat that, Mom? You know, with the baby?"
• Several times when my shirt has lifted up to expose my growing stomach, Eli has giggled and said, "Mommy, I can see the baby sticking out!"
• Maddux often gets confused when she sees me eating something or thinks about me eating something. We've discussed that there are a lot of foods the baby can't eat for the first year or two, but most of the time she translates that to mean that I can't eat them now (since the baby is getting its food from me). 

Mountain Bikers

Long before we had the kids, Lehr and I spent plenty of time on the mountain bike trails. Unfortunately we don't get out there much anymore, especially not together. In the past few years we've discussed when the appropriate time would be to get them out there, but with training wheels, it seemed silly to frustrate one or both kids with a trail their bikes couldn't handle.

In the last year Maddux has graduated to her two-wheeler, and she's recently picked up a bunch of speed. Between that and Eli's new Christmas bike, we decided to give it a go this afternoon. We packed up Lehr's and the kids' bikes and drove to our favorite local spot. This particular spot is great because it has a very tame, flat-ish beginners loop (about a mile) in addition to two more advanced ones. There is also a flat approach 'trail' that links the three, which would also be an option for the kids. I opted to not bring my bike in anticipation of one or more kids needing extra assistance while halfway down the trail.

I could not have been more pleasantly surprised; the kids didn't need ANY help. In fact, I had to run REALLY fast to keep up with them! Both Eli and Maddux did really well, even with the one steep downhill halfway through the beginner trail. Maddux rocked it out, and Eli was quick to follow. They both rode it a few times, Eli falling once and taking a quick 'hurt break'. After we rode the trail, we took the approach section out to the more advanced trails. In the last few months they have built a new BMX trail. We sat and watched several more experienced bikers rock the trail before we saw a few kids. That was enough for Eli; he quickly talked Lehr into following him down the trail. He did great, not falling at all, but bouncing all over the place. We decided Maddux might need another few months riding before she takes a trip down the trail, but it is definitely in her future.

Both kids rode the beginner trail again before ending on the 'field' where there were several logs and bridges and jumps to practice on. Both kids really enjoyed it and really REALLY improved their confidence on their bikes.

Christmas 2012

Christmas was great this year. The kids and I discussed it was an odd pairing of excitement (over next year with the baby) and a slight sadness (over this being the last Christmas with the four of us). The good far outweighed the bad, as the four of us got to spend some quality time together, celebrating our family and the real 'reason for the season'.

I have to say that I was SO excited that this year, more than any other year, the gifts under the tree were not in excess (yay, extended family!!) We've struggled every other year with the amount of 'stuff' that gets wrapped up and delivered for the kids. Lehr and I stick to giving them each one gift and Santa delivers three (SMALL) things for each child. However, the rest of the loot that is usually found under the tree ends up so high in numbers that no one can even remember who each gift comes from. This year, while there were still plenty of gifts to go around, there was a more manageable amount. Yet Eli was still so in awe and in appreciation of what he got. He even commented later in the day that one of his friends that would be visiting later today "won't believe all of the stuff!". I love love love that he was able to look at the wonderful gifts he got and think only of how blessed he was to have them (rather than 'missing' what gifts he didn't get). I know if he'd walked through many other houses yesterday, his 'stash' would have paled in comparison, but (thankfully!) this year, he wasn't comparing his stuff to any one else's.

And when I tucked Maddux in for bed, I asked her how her Christmas had been. Her answer was, "Perfect." Again, with gifts that took up barely any space on the floor or on a credit card, it warms my heart to hear that her day was just as it should have been. I know she and Eli both know that Christmas is celebrating the birth of Jesus and they both know that Christmas is about spending time not money, but knowing and really getting it are not always the same, especially when you're a kid. But the responses of the kids this year really gave hope to Lehr and I that they just might get it.

Polar Express

The kids have loved the book for years, and last year I heard about a train in North Carolina that replicated most of the trip taken in the book. Scheduling and life got in the way last year and I completely forgot about it until just after Thanksgiving this year. Then it hit me that I have kids that are growing up really really fast, and the magic and awe around all things Christmas, including that book, may be short-lived. I quickly hopped online, moved a few photo shoots around and grabbed tickets for the four of us to take a holiday train ride. The only available time slot for the only day that worked for us was 8:30PM; that meant we had to stay in NC for the night after deboarding the train. Perfect for a quick family trip!

The day before we left, I told the kids to pack a small bag because we were going to drive to the Carolinas to take a train to find snow (no mention of the Polar Express at all). Our car DVD player, which only gets used on long car rides, failed us, so the drive up was a little more challenging. Eli has fallen into the habits of his mommy; he is a total bookworm. But Maddux doesn't have the attention span to do anything not involving talking or singing for more than five minutes, so the ride would be fine for a few minutes, followed by a few minutes of Maddux bursting out in a very loud singing voice while Eli loudly protested. Joy. We did stop a few times to do short short short hikes on the side of the road.

Once we arrived in town, we grabbed some lunch and checked into our hotel. We walked around town a little, but the cold and our fatigue at the *late* hour of 7PM made it less than fun to kill time before our later train ride (18-degree windchill!). We opted to drive around and look at a few neighborhoods of holiday lights before getting the kids dressed in their PJ's for the train.

Once we boarded, the kids woke up big time. We were able to sit in a 4-seat section, facing each other. Almost as soon as we were seated, we were served a small thermos of hot cocoa. The kids were in heaven. And minutes later, chocolate chip cookies. Seriously!??! The train drove through some woods, on the way to the North Pole, as a ticket checker came and punched the kids' tickets. Then a hobo (is that the right word?) walked through our car and said, 'hello'. After a few more minutes, they played a recorded reading of the Polar Express book and the car assistants walked around to show the book pages to those of us that forgot to pack our own book. Soon after that we arrived in the North Pole and could see the decorated houses of Santa, Frosty, some of the elves, and Rudolph. (The kicker here was that Maddux was a critic: "That's not REALLY Santa's house. But that's not REALLY Frosty's house. I don't think that is actually an elf's house..")

Once we passed the houses, we saw Santa and his reindeer outside of the window on the other side of the train. Joy....the kids were giddy. Santa was waving and the excitement in train was everywhere. A few minutes later, the train reversed and we started to sing some Christmas carols. The kids loved this, especially when we sang "The 12 Days of Christmas" and our family got to be the first day. Somewhere around the end of the song, Santa boarded our train car and entered from behind Maddux's back. She was the first child he talked to, and given her inability to speak to him, I think he caught her by surprise. She just smiled and he gave her a bell. When he asked Eli what he wanted for Christmas, he grinned and said, "A football". Life is good. He also got a bell before Santa moved on to another family.

Eventually we returned to our boarding area and we drove back to the hotel. The kids passed out pretty quickly, which was good because we had a full day on our drive home. The weather was much nicer, so we stopped for a real hike at Tallulah Gorge. The trail was about a mile around the top and then we opted to take the stairs down to the water and back up. 1100 all together (yup, half of those were coming back up). The kids did REALLY well. Eli even ran up most of them with me.

So so glad we took this trip because it will definitely be harder for the next few years, and as much as I hate to think about it, after that the kids may not crave that Christmas magic anymore.

The Big Reveal

So the news is out now: we are expecting another baby in June 2013. We held off on telling the kids until we were about three months around for a few reasons, one of them being the fact that once they knew, it would likely be public knowledge soon after.

The tough part (for me) was finding a time to tell them. During the week was basically out of the question because by the time Lehr gets home from work, we only have time for dinner, bath, and books before the kids have to be in bed. Since this was such big news for our family, I wanted to be able to tell the kids and allow some family time for it to sink in a little. That leaves the weekends, and those find me just running from one shoot to another these days. This last weekend we had another busy one, but I didn't want to wait any longer. The only way it could work was for us to skip church. (You might argue that we could just tell them after church Sunday and then have the afternoon together, but the weather is always so great on Sunday afternoons that we always end up playing outside with the neighbors.)

So Sunday morning we woke up and came down to have a big breakfast together (something I always miss out on because the three of them typically do that Saturday mornings when I'm gone). Before we started breakfast, we sat them down on the couch and I showed them the ultrasound picture. I was shocked when Maddux knew right away what it was (because she's seen it in her baby book). She thought it was one of herself though. I then explained that yes, it was a picture of inside my belly, and yes, there was a baby in the picture, but this particular picture was taken a month ago, not five years ago. Both of their jaws dropped right then and they grinned like crazy. Eli was so excited to find out that we would have a baby soon, and of course Maddux went into overdrive, telling us all of the things she will do with and for the baby.

Eli first thought the baby would be here in time for Christmas, and was a little disappointed to find out he'd have to wait until after school finished for the year. Next came lots of questions and concerns over what I could and could not eat. They quickly learned that the baby couldn't eat regular food for most of the first year, but for some reason, they translated that to mean that Mommy couldn't eat those foods either. The first thing they told me was, "You can't eat pancakes this morning then." I assured them that even though the baby is getting fed through the food that I eat, my body changes the food into baby-friendly food.

Have I mentioned how excited the kids are? Because they are really really excited. They had a million little questions and comments, but they were all really great and positive ones. As usual, right around lunch time we made our way outside and play ensued with many other neighborhood kids. Within minutes, our news was spread. And then next morning at school? Eli and Maddux told their teachers and friends right away.

Night and Day

This clip doesn't show the full extent of it (and it was taken over the weekend), but every morning Lehr gets to see the polar opposite ends of the spectrum with Maddux and Eli. Since I'm still at boot camp when their alarms go off (and up until they're on the bus), Lehr get to spend the morning with both kids, getting them up, ready and out the door. Eli has really matured in this area, getting up with his own alarm and often times waking Lehr before he hops in the shower. Then he gets dressed, makes his bed, and it downstairs, ready to eat (usually in a good mood too!!!). Maddux, on the other hand, sleeps through her alarm, stretches in bed for as long as possible, wanders to the bathroom, gets distracted on her way back, eventually pulls on clothes and makes it downstairs only after countless reminders, 'encouragements', and warnings from Daddy. One, totally up and at'em, independent and happy...the other, slow-to-wake, needing help every step of the way. The crazy thing is, she doesn't typically need as much sleep as Eli: he's the one that is a grouch when he is lacking snooze time. In fact, even though she didn't have to, Maddux was up by 6:30 last year more mornings than not, just because. Crazy.

Tree Shopping

What a busy Saturday! After the Kids' JAM yesterday, we grabbed a quick lunch and drove to our favorite local tree farm. Maddux was SO excited to cut down the tree herself. (She was under the impression that she was the one that got to cut it this year; maybe we told her that last year?) As expected, the minute we walked into the tree area, the kids started excitedly yelling, "THIS one! No, THIS one! No wait, THIS one!" We had barely moved past the parking lot before they'd each picked three or four that were perfect. We urged them to walk further in, towards the back where I like to take pictures. After a few snapshots, we returned to our shopping. Less than 10 minutes later we all agreed on a tree so Maddux got on the ground next to Daddy and started sawing away. The trees are so soft and have such small trunks that it is fairly easy for the kids to do the work. She didn't make it all of the way through, but she put a dent in it. Just like last year, the kids' favorite part was the tree shaker. (They both do their own impression of the tree being shaken too.)

Kids JAM

Eli had the MOST fun today. Our church pulled together some of the 'older' musicians to help teach and mentor some of the more up-and-coming kids today for a Kids JAM workshop. On Sundays, our kids go to C3 where all elementary kids hang out, worship, play games, watch and participate in a message just for them, and then they break into small groups. The worship band in that room varies from 9 year olds to grandparents. One of the purposes of the Kids JAM was to help some of the kids who want to be up on stage become a little more prepared.

Since Lehr plays in that room often, he led the drum portion of the day. Six wannabe drummers (some who have played before and some who have not) piled on the stage with him, all using a 3-piece set, and learned two worship songs. It was loud and it was awesome. Maddux (she is still too young) hung out and visited all of the groups (vocals, acoustic guitar, keyboards, drums, tech). So so cool!!

Eli's Sports Morals

It's been another growing season for Eli. Not physically (the boy is still on the small side), but in so many ways related to maturity. And it's really really cool to watch.

Since the beginning of time, or at least baseball time, we've used as many opportunities as we could to remind Eli that, in a game, the referee has the final say. In fact, they really have the only say because arguing with them will not change their minds AND it is disrespectful. Eli's seen it on the field in his games, but he never comments on it or seems to notice much. This fall he's gotten much more into watching football on the weekends with Lehr. Obviously there are many opportunities for 'bad calls' on any given Sunday. This last weekend I walked in from outside to find Eli watching the (tivoed) Florida/Florida State game. He gave me a quick update since I had a vested interest. His exact words were, "Well, I don't want to say that the ref was wrong, but it didn't look like the right call to me. Soooo, Florida has the ball again." Cool, cool, cool.

Overnight Reader

Maddux learned to read FAST. For real!

I promise this is not just a case of parental amnesia. You know, where you forget how it was the first time around a particular milestone. "Surely Junior didn't walk so well so quickly." "No way was potty training this hard the first time." Nope...not the case this time. I really do remember when and how Eli came to be a reader. It developed slowly over his Kindergarten year, but at a very steady pace and it wasn't until summer or the start of 1st grade when he was really really reading.

Just this week it became quite obvious that Maddux is a reader. As in: now - this IS happening. At the beginning of the school year, she was reading through some BOB books, needing some prompting here or there, but mostly making it through the 3-letter words. But that was it. Then she progressed through more site words, but outside of that didn't yet grasp the concept of sounding things out and all. This week, she has started to really read when she and I go through a book together. Just the other day she sounded out the work 'funny': "f-uhhh-n. fun. nnnn-ee. funny?" Amazing. And then we came to the word 'alone' and she said, "ah-llll-ah-n. Oh wait, there is a bossy e!! Ahh-l-O-n?" That girl.....

Thanksgiving Play

Eli has been preparing for a few weeks for a class Thanksgiving play. He was chosen to play the part of Chief Massasoit, meaning he got to inform the audience that we'd be joining for a meal AND tell a few jokes. We practiced his lines at home and he was fairly comfortable with them from the get-go... It was amazing to me that he wasn't nervous. Well, I think he maybe was, because of the way he smiled wide through the delivery of his jokes and the way his leg twitched as he spoke, but he never mentioned his nerves.

The main responsibility for us regarding the play was creating a costume for Eli. We took a family trip to the craft store and got feathers, felt, a brown t-shirt, and a few random beads. Lehr was the mastermind behind much of the headdress, and Eli was very happy with how it turned out.

Snaggletooth

Eli lost two teeth last year, but nothing so much as a wiggle since then. During recess on Friday, Eli spiked the football and ended up with a mouth full of pigskin. Blood and a wiggly tooth later, he was released from the school nurse. He assured me there was no pain, but he talked very cautiously and wouldn't eat a snack that afternoon. A few times as we were doing homework and the such, he would hop up to grab a napkin due to his mouth bleeding again (totally due to him forcing the tooth front and back with his tongue or fingers). Then, just before Daddy got home, he extracted the front tooth completely from his mouth. His poor gums looked traumatized, but he once again maintained that it didn't hurt. So now we have a small little boy with a shaved head and a BIG hole in his mouth where a very little tooth used to reside.

Backyard

Because we like to keep our life complicated and full and always 'in progress', we started a backyard renovation last spring. Just before school let out, we had 14 trees removed from our yard, then we had the ground leveled and retaining walls built, then we added a fence and grass. Voila...now we can actually PLAY in our backyard. (A garden is soon to come...maybe spring?) A few weekends ago, we took the day to clean the yard (pine straw and leaves accumulate on grass much quicker than on ivy, or maybe it's just more noticeable....) and spread out some pine straw on un-grassed areas. Once we finished that, we made a temporary fire pit. Since it was so nice outside that weekend, we just HAD to try it out that night. Lehr got some marshmallows and the kids found roasting sticks. After dinner we sat on a blanket by the fire and roasted. Eli brought out the current Harry Potter selection and I read from it until there was no more light to read by. My conclusion? Fire pit=happy family times.

Parent Teacher Conferences

At the end of the first nine-weeks, our elementary school has parent-teacher conferences for all students. We've been through it twice with Eli, but this was the first time through for Maddux. With both teachers we have had some communication throughout the fall, so we weren't expecting any surprises.

Maddux was first and her conference went great. The teacher touched on her love of talking, at ALL times, but didn't dwell on it at all. She gave her rave reviews, academically, especially for being the youngest in the class, even commenting that she is one of the top few readers in the class. Her report card reflected the same, only dipping down in areas like 'self-control' or 'not monopolizing every conversation and/or discussion in the classroom'. Lehr and I inquired about her desire to be 'involved' with the other kids; we were curious if it ever came across like she was overstepping her bounds and starting to be bossy. The teacher assured us that Maddux's classmates LOVE having her in their group or at their table, and none of them have yet to see her interactions with them negatively. (So far, so good!!)

Eli's conference went well also. He is doing well in all of his subjects, especially reading and math. His teacher seems to really enjoy him and even when she told us about his tendency to talk too much at times, she did it with a genuine smile on her face. Our concern with Eli is his short stature and how he holds his own in a class of BIG boys that seem to want to control things on the playground. She said that so far he's doing really well with it and he's standing up for himself when he needs to.

Both kids with great report cards and teachers who seem to enjoy them: Life Is Good.

Gymnastics

My gym rats...Eli and Maddux are still LOVING their once/week gymnastics class. Maddux is a monkey out there, she can walk the beam, forward or backwards, often not even glancing at the beam. And Eli has come a long way with handstands, cartwheels and all kinds of 'hanging' things. They both look forward to their classes, but even more so, they are both constantly 'practicing'. Even in the driveway, they will do handstands or cartwheels in between tosses of the ball, or while raking the leaves in the yard.

Halloween Week

Hurricane Sandy blew up the east coast this week, leaving us with really windy and cold weather. Luckily, it was starting to die down by Halloween and the kids still had a great time trick-or-treating and enjoying outdoor festivities that day.

Two days before the holiday was Maddux's first field trip. Her class (and all of the other Kindergartners) got to ride a school bus a little north to Cagle's Dairy Farm. Maddux got to feed a baby pig and see all kinds of farm animals. She loved it, but she did say it was very cold.

The night before Halloween, we finally carved the pumpkins. We'd held off over the weekend in hopes of some warmer weather, but when that didn't come, Lehr and Eli just carved them inside. (Maddux had an incident at school resulting in her loss of 'carving privlidges' that night.) Eli REALLY enjoyed this. We let him do the actual carving for the first time this year, and his close attention to Halloween Wars on the Food Channel paid off. He was very focused and intentional about everything he did, and he even had a story to go with the pumpkin when he was done.

Halloween night found us parading in the neighborhood with our friends and then trick-or-treating home from the pool area. Eli did complain quite a bit about his costume once we started; he was wearing the costume, carrying his candy bucket and a light saber, wearing a mask and gloves. It was too much and I think we all decided next year we would go for a 'less involved' costume. We spent most of the night with our neighbors across the street, and no one had to pay the fee for running through other people's grass this year. (Our penalty is miss two houses and give mom or dad a piece of your candy.) The kids didn't even flinch when I told them to pick their favorite seven pieces at the end of the night because we were donating the rest to the soldiers. (We did that last year too.) All in all, another great year with the Wicked Witch of the West and Darth Vader!

The End of Soccer

Maddux had her last soccer game this weekend. She and her team came really far and had a great last game, complete with one goal by Mad Dog. After the game they had pizza and cupcakes and trophies (Oh My!). Maddux is already asking to be signed up to play again...