About a year ago, Ruby was asked to be a flower girl for the wedding of OUR flower girl and her fiancé. Of course, she was happy to accept, even though she didn't have much of a concept of what a wedding was, let alone a flower girl.
About a month ago we found her dress and started practicing what her responsibilities would be. Lehr found a basket and I ripped up some paper so that Ruby could practice tossing pedals as she walked down a long aisle.
The day of was a windy, but beautiful Florida day and Ruby woke me up with the sun, saying, "It's wedding day!" She was obviously excited. Maddux, Ruby and I went to the venue several hours ahead of the ceremony so that Ruby could take part in seeing the girls get dressed and participating in any photos requested. After watching the bride get her hair done, Ruby agreed to have hers fixed as well. She sat very well for the stylist to curl and braid her hair. (And then Maddux even got some curls!)
When it came time, Ruby sat for all of the photos in the dressing area, and then a little later she stood for photos outside with everyone. Her stamina was wearing off, but she held it together. The ceremony time arrived and Ruby walked down the outdoor aisle like a champ, doing exactly what we'd told her to. (Walk slowly, dropping pedals and stop when you get to the altar.)
Even though I thought we might leave before the reception because of Ruby's exhaustion, she was doing so well that we stayed. She ate dinner and even danced with Daddy once. The drive home was over thirty minutes, and she did pass out before it was over, but all in all, she hung in amazingly well. That girl surprises me at every turn, acting mature beyond her years at times.
We've been stuck inside a lot. Inside our house, and inside of our neighborhood. We are so blessed that we've had the option to walk around our neighborhood to get some fresh air, but at this stage of the quarantine, we are desperate for some new scenery.
So Ruby and I took the car for a drive around some 'empty' spaces today.
We ended up at a field I've shot some photos at before and it was a welcomed adventure.
Ruby had a great time looking for flowers and playing in the tall grass. (No snakes today, thankfully!)
And here we are, celebrating yet another milestone that has had to drastically change during these crazy times. We've known the bride and groom since they were in elementary school. We've had the pleasure of working with them in the areas of music and photography and general church youth things. Their wedding was planned before COVID was what it is now, but rather than let that get them down or cancel their wedding, they just shifted and made an unforgettable drive-in wedding.
Maddux and Ruby were still part of the wedding party that walked down the outdoor aisle, only to return to our car.
Eli and Lehr were dapper guests, dressed to the nines.
(I was shooting, so I was able to have a front row seat to the entire day.)
It was not what the couple planned on, but I can say it is a wedding our family will always remember!
whenever we find it in our busy schedule, i get excited and find myself breathing it in deeply.
the randomly discovered friday night or sunday afternoon that we end up riding our bikes on the beltline or playing in the yard is so coveted but so hard to come by.
when the spread of the virus reached the point that warranted school closing, our family went into shelter-in-place mode. ruby's lungs and immune system are inconsistently compromised, so we don't need to take any unnecessary chances. it's my opinion that if we are going to do this, let's do it all of the way.
the first week found us learning the new normal with school, work and play all taking place at home. there were some bumps along the way, but for the most part, we transitioned quickly and jumped right on board with the extra time to just 'be' as a family.
what that is currently looking like is breakfast and lunch with at least one other person, savored 'coffee' time (ruby drinks 'coffee milk' or 'fancy milk' in a mug with her pinky up), bike rides, family walks, evening foot golf in our yard, dinner together EVERY night, lots of family movie nights, random house organizations and yard projects, and chalk. so. much. chalk.
there was never a better time to have a new driveway and back deck - i am SO grateful that we were able to replace those two things in the last three years. they have made this time much more comfortable. and the timing of this life shutdown in our kids' lives is on-point. in another few years eli might be away at college, and maddux could be driving. having this happen while we are all under this roof still is a gift.
but most of all, i'm in awe of all of the margin we've been afforded. it's pretty much a 180-degree shift from our usual life, and as much as we love all of our music and sports and activities and therapies and gatherings with others, this never-knowing-what-time-it-is, nowhere-to-be, party of five lifestyle is working pretty well for us.
we own more movies than I can count. they almost never get touched. road trips are almost exclusively when our DVDs get used. I honestly forgot we had such a selection. but this week maddux and lehr are painting the closet where we store the mountains of movies, so they are temporarily housed in the front hall.
ruby loves this arrangement. she has been stacking and sorting and counting and thoroughly investigating them daily since the closet was emptied. she has not seen even half of these gems, so her interest has definitely been piqued.
it has been so fun to hear her reading the movie cases or rejoycing in finding one of her favorites or counting the latest stack she's made of movies she wants to "bring on the airplane for sleepover at grandpa's".
this girl. she is growing and learning and thriving in so many areas!
Eli and his band, '99 Corolla (not HIS band, but the band he is in), released an EP this week on iTunes. Four original songs for the public's listening pleasure. To commemorate the event, they hosted an EP release party over the weekend. at said party, they performed about eight songs, only one of them not their original material. (Long live The Meters.)
I keep saying it, and I hope that I keep saying it: I love the opportunity and experience that Eli has in regards to '99 Corolla. The work ethic, the integrity, the passion, the collaborative effort, the friendships...it has all been in the black. I could not have picked a better 'first band' experience for him if I tried, and I have to believe that having the baseline experience set the bar so high will help with Eli's expectations for himself and those he works with in future endeavors.
Today was another amazing opportunity day. Usually opportunities for Ruby means opportunities for our family too. That was definitely the case today!
When Ruby was living in the hospital, she and I would make a trip down to the garden area every morning (and usually every afternoon too!). We were such regular visitors that a woman (Amy) who worked in one of the ground level offices overlooking the area came out to introduce herself one morning about a month in because she'd seen us out there every day. We've kept in loose online contact over the years, even when Amy started working for the stadium instead of the hospital.
As September is Childhood Cancer Awareness month, there are 'gold' events at sports arenas all over the place right now. Our friend, Amy, contacted us a few weeks ago about attending a soccer game where they planned to gather families from all over Atlanta that have been affected by childhood cancer to form a gold ribbon on the field before kickoff. Unfortunately we couldn't attend. But a few days after I turned the offer down, Amy reached out to me again to ask if Ruby would be interested in being honorary Team Captain for Atlanta United for a game the following week. WOW!! This meant that all five of us could attend the game and Ruby and a parent would take the field for the national anthem.
This resulted in Ruby and I hanging out on the sidelines at Mercedes Benz stadium even before Atlanta United came out to warm up. Then, when they warmed up, the woman escorting us was made aware of a few extra field passes, and she asked if I thought the rest of our family would want to come down to the field too. Eli couldn't get down to us fast enough!
So we all watched the team warm up, and a few players came over to say hi (Eli's mind was blown!). Then, just before the team was about to be announced, Ruby went to the locker room entrance with our escort so that they could lead the team through the tunnel and onto the field. Ruby did SO great, grabbing the ball at the right time and standing so attentively on the field. She did not walk out like we planned (the escort carried her), but everything else was flawless.
As soon as she exited the field, we were ushered out of the field area and back into general population. We found our seats and enjoyed the game. Both teams scored pretty quickly, but it was still a tie going into the 90th minute of the game. When Atlanta United scored the winning goal, the place went bonkers, including Ruby!
Words can't even describe how full my heart is right now. Our weekend was full of stuff: events, work, sports, music, but we were together for all of it, which made it so so fun for our family. Two fo the highlights for us included our favorite band, The Revivalists. We've had tickets for four of us (minus Ruby) to see their concert on Saturday night forever. This last week, however, Maddux thought maybe it would be too late and she'd rather stay home with Ruby and an older friend. We obliged, but not without trying (unsuccessfully) to sway her up until the hour before.
Eli, Lehr and I had a GREAT time at the show, obviously. The front row tickets helped a lot; long gone are the days where we used to arrive 30-60 minutes before their show and hold the front row without much pushback. Their set was a great compilation of all of their albums, giving us many 'old school' gems. We got high fives from Rob (sax player) once he saw us, and near the end, David (lead singer) put the microphone in Eli's face and asked him his name and age, then told the audience to 'give it up for Eli!' Then, "give it up for his PARENTS!" (We won't let Eli live that down any time soon.)
As amazing as the show was, Sunday was even better. Ruby's time in the hospital connected us with Josh and Songs for Kids years ago. We love the organization and have been as involved as we can in their fundraising and supporting their vision for future endeavors. About a year ago they opened up a recording/playing studio to allow for serving the kids who are still very much living with medical 'stuff' but aren't staying at the hospital so much. So they can come to the studio and get music lessons, or play with the musician volunteers, or attend mini concerts put on by musical acts that come through town. We attended the grand opening, but have been unable to check out any concerts. Knowing that The Revivalists worked with Josh in New Orleans in the past though, we knew they'd try to be at the studio, and we wouldn't miss it for the world.
I can't adequately express how cool the experience was. We've seen our boys up close and personal over the years, so as amazing as that is, that was not what put this over the top. The kids and families in attendance were all in, jumping and dancing and singing the whole time. And these kids were not shy about talking to the band or playing instruments with them - that had to be refreshing for the guys! The afternoon started with some of the SFK kids performing one of The Revivalist's songs that they'd been rehearsing. Then the boys did three songs, pulling kids in on the last one. As soon as they were done, Josh had any/all SFK kids find a band member and work with them on whatever instrument they had. It was chaos, amazing, musical, joyful chaos. Ruby made her rounds from Zack, to Ed, finally to Andrew. I tried to grab a few videos and phone photos, but honestly I just held my spot at the back of the crowd trying to take it all in.
The best (for us) was yet to come. Most of the families had left and the drums were open, so we encouraged Eli to sit down at the set (we'd told the big ones to 'back off' the whole time till now because this experience was for the SFK kids, not them). As soon as Eli did, Andrew's ears perked up and he joined in for a few measures. My favorite part was when he said to Eli, "Oh, you can really play!"
Pure heart explosion to see our favorite band of all time mashed up with an organization so near and dear to our hearts - Best. Weekend. Ever.
sometimes we get a glimpse into a really cool world. one where ruby has friends around her. friends who just love her. friends who don't need lehr or i to translate or facilitate.
we've not had a lot of this, as ruby is still young. don't get me wrong - we've had friends at church and school and in the neighborhood. friends who put in effort and who are awesome and loving and kind.
but sometimes a shining friend makes you realize what you didn't know was missing. sometimes you find a friend who shines His light bright into our lives. a friend that doesn't really seem to be trying to be a friend - they just are.
they are getting as much out of the friendship as ruby is.
I honestly wonder how many times I've blogged about this... I do know that whatever the number, it pales in comparison to the amount of times I take note of it, which is likely a fraction of the number of examples in each day. I know this sounds braggy, but for the oh so many times I get it wrong, especially with Maddux, by pointing out the ways she doesn't do what I think she should do with her time and energy, I want to be sure and document how much right I see in her heart.
I have to remind myself that what I think I want for her might not line up with what God has planned for her.
My girl...she loves, she loves kids, she loves serving kids. Since leaving Kids' Ministry, as a participant, last May, she has probably only attending the 'big' service with us 2 or 3 times, one of those being the Sunday that she was baptized. Every week she volunteers in the Preschool Ministry, willingly. She is now a volunteer that gets signed up about once/month, but whether signed up or not, Maddux reports to the coordinator when we arrive each Sunday and she has never been turned away.
It's not just that she volunteers though. Anyone can do that...even I even do that. But my heart is not in it even half as much as Maddux's is. She loves working with those kids, and not just the fun parts. She will crawl on the ground to pick up goldfish, usher kids to the restroom, pick up mini crayon bits off of the table again and again and again...none of it phases her. I've seen her patiently cutting out a craft for the kids, while carrying on a conversation with one kid to her side, while another sits on her lap, hugging her for comfort. All the while, she is calm as a cucumber and so in her element. And she seeks out the ones who need the most, whether it's manifesting in tears or acting out, she's usually right on it. I want to be her when I grow up.
About once a month I am approached by an adult at church that works with her for the first time, or maybe just talks to me about it for the first time, and they 'just have to tell' me how awesome she is or what a good worker she is or how great she is with the kids. Sometimes they'll ask me what I did to help her be so great. This is the part where I seriously laugh out loud because I had nothing to do with it. Seriously - she is the nurturer I never was (even at my best). This is all God, growing her gift for nurturing and serving, and it brings me so so SO much joy to be able to watch.
Yet another fun VBX in the books. As we are in the year of many transitions, this year's VBX added another 'new' experience for our family. While Lehr was still in charge of music, and I was mostly behind the camera, and Eli was playing drums all week, Maddux joined the volunteer ranks and Ruby attended as an official camper for the first time!
When we first talked to Maddux about where she might want to volunteer, she said she wanted to do the motions on stage, for sure. That was a no-brainer, as many of the youth do that in addition to their other roles. However, last summer Maddux was exposed to a song that she knew would be great for VBX. So we kept it in our pocket all year and when it came time for Lehr to pick songs, she campaigned hard for "Royals". It worked and Lehr chose it, but what was even better is Maddux and I worked together to come up with the motions for that song. She took a lot of pride in it, and was even able to help out the volunteer in charge of teaching the dances. So fun!
And it should come as no surprise that Maddux chose working with a group of kids as a 'group guide' as her other (main) job. Also not shocking was that she wanted to help in Ruby's group. This was perfect, as we were not sure how to ensure a successful camp for Ruby without one of us present.
But without us even mentioning that to Maddux, she stepped up. (In the end, Lehr ended up working with that group as well.) I loved seeing Maddux help the kids in her group - while she was there for Ruby, she gravitated towards two other little girls more often. She has such a beautiful gift!
Ruby had a great time, eating and playing with her friends. Maddux had a blast, dancing and getting to know new kids in the youth group and 'guiding' her kindergartners. And Eli loved playing drums and working with two of his 'big' friends as a water boy.
Today was a good day. Like, a really good day. The big kids weren't even with me very much...what made it good was what they were doing while out of my house.
Maddux is in the summer of transitions. She's about to start middle school which means new opportunities with church and sports and youth group... so much at once! Regarding church, she gets to attend FUEL (the youth group for 6-12th graders), but she is also without a 'class' during the actual church service each week. When Eli is not playing in the band for the elementary kids' service, he sits with friends (or us, if we're lucky) in the big service. Maddux has already found a home, serving in the preschool area any time they will let her. Since we are always short on volunteers, they let her every week! She has such a heart for kids, especially the little ones, so she loves doing this. I asked her last week if she would ever come sit with me in the big service and she kind of wrinkled her nose and said, "Maybe one week, but only if we were here for both services so I could still work with the kids." Not at all a shock since anytime I try to find her at church, she is under a pile of kids on her lap, reading books and engaging them in songs.
Today my girl served with some littles (maybe 2-3 year olds?) alongside a family friend. I didn't know the friend was in there with Maddux until she ran up to me after the service. She could not stop raving about Maddux and how great she is with all of the kids, not getting frazzled when they are upset, but instead calmly meeting them where they are. She reminded me of all of the amazing ways God has blessed Maddux with the gift of serving others. "It was an honor to work with her today." There are so many times I see her with Ruby and think the same thing...
Maddux does not get this from me: our social IQ's could not be further from one another. I honestly feel it is an absolute God-given gift, the way she is able to connect with people and make them feel at ease. I saw it last week also when I drove her and a friend to camp each day. Maddux and her friend hadn't had many opportunities to hang out in many months, so I wasn't sure if the conversation would flow on the first day. But Maddux never missed a beat, sitting in the middle seat with her friend instead of the front (as she would prefer), asking her friend all kinds of great, specific and intentional questions about her summer, helping her to feel comfortable. I seriously drove the whole way with my jaw on the ground, in absolute awe at her social ease and intelligence.
On to the boy... It's no secret that music is something Eli loves. He's been playing drums since age two, and he's picked up the trumpet and guitar in the last two years. Even though he only started with the electric guitar just over a year ago, it's where he spends most all of his free time these days. This week he was listed as the lead guitar for the Sunday morning kids' services for the first time. He was SO excited. And when he went to rehearsal on Thursday night, Lehr said he was shocked at how well he had prepared himself and how well he played.
So this morning, Eli was at church by 7AM, rehearsing and then playing guitar in two services. Then he returned to the church about an hour later to set up and rehearse for the next week's camp. (At this camp, he'll be playing drums with another worship band.) In total, he was at church for about nine hours, worshiping with two different instruments and two different bands. His passion for those instruments right now is impressive. And in a house where music is king, it warms my soul to see him working so hard on it and holding his own so well.
Where do I begin? There is no way I can sufficiently describe the amazing awesomeness that was Ruby's Make-A-Wish trip to Disney. The red carpet treatment extended beyond any boundaries I could have imagined when she was given the trip towards the end of her treatment last year. (During Ruby's hospitalization we were asked to apply for a Wish for Ruby, and shortly after she finished treatment, we were given the green light that she was approved for a Disney trip. We chose to wait until this week because of school schedules and our schedules and to allow Ruby to be as recovered from the chemo as possible.)
We flew to Florida on Friday night, where we were greeted by a Make A Wish volunteer escort. She walked us directly to the baggage claim and then straight out to the rental car lot where our car (and car seat) were waiting for us. This already felt like star treatment. We then drove about 40 minutes to the Give Kids The World Village (I will dedicate a whole blog post to that place later!) where we were again greeted by someone waiting specifically for us. There was a to-go dinner in our 'villa', and a volunteer walked me through a brief orientation to give me all of the details we would need for the week.
At our disposal, we had several days of tickets for the Disney parks, Sea World, Universal Studios/Islands of Adventure, and many other 'smaller' Orlando attractions. In addition, we had free parking, free photo services, and some perks at each park. The best perk? The mack-daddy of all fast passes at each park. At Sea World it meant getting preferential seating at shows if we wanted, trays of fish to feed the sea lions and sharks, and first dibs in line for any rides. At Universal/Islands of Adventure it gave us first dibs in most lines, and special parking. And at the Disney parks it was a Genie Pass which gave us preferential treatment for photos around the park (including the photo files), fast pass lines for any rides at ALL times, and front of the line privileges to meet the characters.
For reals.
Our first day we hit Sea World, where the big kids rode their first
'real' roller coaster. They didn't mess around either; they rode one
that dangled their feet and turned them every which way, AND they rode
it twice! We saw several shows, fed several animals, and even got rained
on a little. Eli and Maddux loved the sea lion show most. That night we
made it back for dinner and having fun around the village.
Lehr and I agree that the character benefits were by far the best, especially for Ruby. Not only did she get to meet way more princesses and characters than she even had a working knowledge of, but many of them gave her lots of one-on-one attention. Our first encounter was at Epcot with Jasmine. We waited in line for a minute, unsure of how to use our pass (we hadn't done that yet), and then Lehr decided to find someone to ask. That cast member not only brought us to another entrance, but she raced us around the back way to intercept Jasmine walking to her post so that Ruby could meet her in the alley and walk with her. Unbelievable.
And when it came time to meet Elsa and Anna? We were ushered into a back room to find Anna hiding from Ruby, so Ruby got to 'hide and snow seek' with her for a minute. The look on her face when she saw Anna was perfect. (This had such a lasting impression that Ruby
looked behind the curtain a few days later when she met Rapunzel.) Needless to say, Ruby absolutely loved meeting these two, as they are the only two Disney characters she really knew about before this trip. The Frozen ride was a big hit with Ruby too, as she had the opportunity
to sing along to Let It Go and see her favorite characters while she
rode in a boat through the scenes. It was very dark in there, but I
grabbed some video anyway to get her audio reactions. We stayed well
after dinner, but not late for the fireworks. It was such a good day
that we didn't want to push our luck.
The big kids definitely appreciated the benefits of having this crazy fast pass access too. Time after time we walked up and boarded a ride within 10 minutes of arriving, even though the lines for everyone else were estimated to be 50-90 minutes. This allowed us to cover a lot of ground at all of the parks.
The following day we opted to split up, leaving Lehr and Ruby at the village to swim and play while I took Eli and Maddux to Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure. The two parks are right next to each other (they share an entrance and parking deck), and they each have a Harry Potter section. We'd decided to focus on that park of the parks, likely not doing many of the other rides or attractions. It's a good thing too because we got three rougher rides/coasters in a row that messed with my equilibrium so much that I ended up sitting down for about an hour afterward to regain my balance. The kids loved the HP stuff, but around 3 they both agreed we should head home to play with Daddy and Ruby. We even managed to go in the pool before dinner because it was so warm out that day! Oh, and the village had an awesome Halloween party that night that we were able to participate in.
We followed that day up with the Magic Kingdom. Another day full of sprinting around the park, hitting many rides. We counted 15 rides, lots of character meetings, two sit down meals, one parade and the fireworks. Pretty impressive...totally a perk of having that pass! Eli and Maddux and I didn't get to Space Mountain until after the fireworks, but they agreed that it was worth the wait. They LOVED it and it was a great ride to end the day on.
Our last full day was full of rain, so rather than slop through another park, we opted to stay back at the village. Unfortunately we didn't get to golf because of the rain, and we only found one hour of non-rain to swim, but there were plenty of games to play, ice cream cones to eat, and naps to take to pass the time. Oh, and the kids got to ride on horses...Ruby LOVED that! After dinner we participated in a Village Idol show and then watched Toy Story in the theater next door. (Did I mention how cool the Village was?!?) Village Idol is where any/all kids that want to perform an 'act' get up on stage and then get feedback from judges (all positive). We saw everything from jokes to light saber skills. Eli, Maddux and Ruby got up and danced to "Bad Blood" - totally impressed that the big kids would volunteer to do that.
Our flight wasn't until after lunch the next day, so we opted to get out early and hit Epcot for a few hours before heading to the airport. After all, we'll never have the access with that pass again! We saw Elsa and Anna again, rode the frozen ride, and hit Test Track...a great end to a great trip!
